With gray divorce on the rise, you may be facing a split in your 50s, 60s, 70s or even 80s. When you have an adult child with a disability, then what happens to the child could become a pressing concern. In fact, you may have stayed married as long as you did because of that child.
Issues to consider are where the child will live, how parents can best care for the child and if there will be child support payments.
A focus on yourself as well
Divorce can be tough economically no matter how old you are. However, it can be even tougher for older or retired people. This is partly because you may need to divide your retirement accounts, and you are living separately with the extra expenses that incurs. If you are in retirement, you may not have as much income coming in every month as you would like.
So, one of your top priorities in divorce does need to be a focus on whether you have the means and tools to support yourself or can gain them. Only when you are in a good position to care for yourself can you care for your adult child as well as possible.
Your adult child
It is usually in your best interest to resolve the matter of an adult child with a disability with your ex rather than leave it up to a judge. You can try to split everything close to 50-50, with the child taking turns living with you and your ex. Whoever the child is with at the time pays for expenses. Alternatively, you can discuss an agreement where the child lives full time with one parent and the other pays support if needed. Consider income levels, debt levels and the like too. Other aid in various forms may be available as well, so check with a service such as Dakota at Home.